As I sat hungry aboard my long haul economy flight to South Africa I waited for my in-flight meal with baited breath. Awaiting our lunch I began thinking who else was attending this dinner party at 35,000 feet? To my left a teenage girl interested in little more than perforating her ear drums, and my right an elderly man concentrating on inspecting the inside of his eyelids. I realised immediately this may be a lonely TV dinner for one. I was reminded of the question, “who would you invite to a dinner party if you had the chance?”
I then got to thinking who I would have as a travel companion given the opportunity. Perhaps I would see Memphis through the eyes of Elvis, accompany Grace Kelly to a premier in Monaco or forget all of that completely and invite a Michelin Star Chef to assist the cabin crew in the galley right now.
Eventually the stewardess graciously made her way down the aisle asking that all important question, “chicken or Beef” and dutifully attending to the herbivores along the way, some of whom were slightly disgruntled at the lack of difference between vegan and vegetarian meals.
Tucking into my obligatory bread roll I couldn’t help but think how pleasant the tray looked, but at the same time wondered how in keeping were the portion sizes with the rest of the world. It wasn’t too many years ago that we became faced with the supersize culture, that rapidly spread throughout fast food outlets but seemingly didn’t make its way skyward. Fast food comes in size options and that alone may be a beneficial influence on in-flight meals. It is true that chains have found their way to the strangest places, just last year I was at the foot of the Pyramids in Cairo ready to fully submerge myself in the hieroglyphics of the ancient Egyptians, only to be faced with the latest bargain bucket deal.
I am certainly not encouraging fast food chains onto airlines but an option to supersize perhaps.
Faced with my meal I began thinking that fast food may be a better option for the simple fact that I would not have to tackle my personal gripe of plastic cutlery. I understand the reasoning behind its use on planes but nothing is more awkward than sawing your way through a breast of chicken with an implement no sharper than a baby spoon, whilst tucked into a space no larger than a sheep pen. I began to tuck into my food at pace in the hope that my elbows would behave themselves and not disturb The Kings of Leon concert to my left and Sleeping Beauty to my right. Supersize may not relate solely to food. As someone close to 6ft, a little extra space between rows to enjoy my meal would be no bad thing either.
If you are indulging in business class food and service then the trivial matter of plastic knives and forks may not be that relevant. Food service however is a topic close to all our hearts as highlighted in recent years by celebrity chef Jamie Oliver, who vastly improved the quality of school dinners. Perhaps it is time to shine the spotlight on economy airline meals and give them a celebrity makeover. If this were the case I would certainly know who to invite as a table companion for my next airline appetiser.
